Life moves and we continually move with it.
Some weeks are filled with sameness and that is so good.
We have fun and we laugh and I watch forts being built on chairs.
Fresh fruit in the fridge and blue eyes are dancing. Lovely colored painting are on the wall and new photographs. The home smells like brownies and we are smiling.
Sometimes the sameness makes the small annoyances of life seem greater than they really are.
In all honesty - I not that Mom that is always patient. That serves her children unselfishly. I do not always take interruptions well. If I am tired... I am grumpy.
I wish I wasn't.
I hate my weakness.
I am still counting gifts...
The pages are filling, but slowly. Because it's not easy for me to see them sometimes. But it is getting easier for me to see my own yuckiness bubbling to the surface. How many things I'd rather NOT accept as Grace - a gift. It's a 180 thinking.
a rest interrupted...
a day combating strife and squabbles..
Chores unfinished and stuff left on the floor..
friends struggling, no words...
4am and still can not sleep....
All is Grace?????
It is all Grace... Give Thanks.... Write those down.
I am trying to understand how, but really what I need to do is just accept.
Trust in the Lord with all my heart and not lean on my own understanding.. acknowledge Him in all my ways... trust.. He will make my path straight. (Prov3:5-6)
And so I do write it down and I say Thank you, and then I find I AM filled with gratitude. For forgiveness and second chances, for a new morning filled with mercy, for God being on the throne - still.
Grace - His undeserved kindness, His giving of gifts that I don't understand. For the purpose of understanding that I am small... and HE is Big.